May 21, 2007 14:52
16 yrs ago
1 viewer *
Russian term

Бригадир и Отличница

Russian to English Art/Literary Poetry & Literature
These are the two characters of the story. The author does not give them real names, but instead creates character types that are somewhat rooted in the Soviet past.

Below please find their descriptions:

"Но это был далеко не тот рабочий, которого снисходительно называют «работяга». Внимательный взгляд веселых глаз, слегка вьющиеся черные волосы с ранним налетом седины и крупный шнобель с горбинкой придавали его лицу дьявольски хитрое выражение, которое мало вязалось с его атлетической фигурой. Так что, если этот человек и работал где-нибудь на заводе или стройке, то никак не простым рабочим, а, как минимум, бригадиром. Поэтому мы так и назовем его: Бригадир."

"Волевой подбородок свидетельствовал о твердости характера, а лучистые серые глаза в сочетании с собранными в «конский хвост» волосами придавали женщине вид отличницы как боевой, так и политической подготовки. Мы так назовем ее: Отличница."

I'd appreciate any ideas regarding "Бригадир" and "Отличница."

My greatest problem is that they are Soviet realia (cultural notions) that come with a whole package of connotations which I need to convey at least partially. On the other hand, I need something that wouldn't throw off the Anglophone audience by sounding too foreign or too awkward.

Thank you very much for helping me out.

Proposed translations

+7
7 mins
Selected

foreman and valedictorian

I don't see many problems with "foreman", however "valedictorian" is a stretch.

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Note added at 11 mins (2007-05-21 15:04:01 GMT)
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What might be rather humorous is calling her "Excellent". I think this would only be possible in a more light-hearted or comical story, which is not the sense I get from the two excerpts, but "Excellent" would retain many more of the Soviet connotations than valedictorian.
Peer comment(s):

agree Alexander Demyanov : I don't see it as too much of a strech. //Sorry, I was late to realize that the original doesn't refer to academic excellence. "Valedictorian" then would really be a stretch//Nothing personal, Henry./On 3rd thought, this would perfectly render the irony.
7 mins
agree Mark Vaintroub : I think "valedictorian" would be the best choice in this case
8 mins
agree Vladimir Dubisskiy : valedictorian is nice here
1 hr
agree R. E. M : This is a good one!
1 hr
agree Kirill Semenov : Miss Perfection?
1 hr
I guess Roman will know best, but this is a good idea
agree Olga Vlasova : Even if valedictorian is not the most accurate translation it's still the best because it's one word. Besides, the image this word creats would be the closest to the type of person "otlichnitsa" is.
5 hrs
agree Alexandra Tussing
1 day 7 hrs
Something went wrong...
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer. Comment: "Thank you, Henry, and also thanks to all of you for your feedback!"
8 mins

Boss and Good Girl

Obviously, I'm not Anglo Saxon, but guess, those would suit.
Something went wrong...
11 mins

Foreman and Honor Student (no articles)

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Note added at 20 mins (2007-05-21 15:13:54 GMT)
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Scratch the "student". I should have read your context more carefuly.

How about "Foreman and Excellence Badge", "badge" alluding to both military and girl scout achievements.

Or even "Foreman and Badges".

Something went wrong...
+4
1 hr

Smartass Toiler and Perfectionist Lady

my version.
(considering 'дьявольски хитрое выражение') :-))

or, stealing Valedictorian from Henry (sorry):

Smartass Toiler and Valedictorian
Peer comment(s):

agree Henry Schroeder : No problem, Vladimir, Perfection may be even better if the "school" side isn't relevant, though I slightly prefer Kirill's Miss Perfection
35 mins
Thank you and actually context says женщине (not девушке), so it was more likely Mrs.(mistress) not Miss, and hardly 'a girl' :-)
agree Vanda Nissen
12 hrs
Thank you!
agree vera12191
14 hrs
agree Alexandra Tussing : could be possible
1 day 5 hrs
Something went wrong...
+2
1 hr

Team Leader and the Straight A Girl

Obvioulsy, there is no one best version here. Mine has a sort of an inner rhythm to it, and I like it. Hope you do too.
Peer comment(s):

agree Valery Kaminski
2 hrs
Thank you, Valery
agree Alexandra Tussing
1 day 5 hrs
Something went wrong...
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