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Portuguese to English translations [PRO] Poetry & Literature / Lyrical poetry
Portuguese term or phrase:a brancura embainhada de um lenço
De outra algibeira, alada Ponta a roçar o solo, A brancura embainhada De um lenço... Deu-lho a criada Velha que o trouxe ao colo. -- Fernando Pessoa
To me, it conjures up a very white handkerchief. How could this be expressed without using an adjective intensifier? Is there a single adjective that conveys this idea? (The phrase has to be short.)
Note: I've seen a few instances of "the sheated whiteness of a handkerchief", most of which in translations of this poem but also in this example: "Stevens looked down incuriously at the sheathed whiteness of his shattered leg."
I don't like the fact that it's too long. The translation has to be short to fit in.
In my previous question, I posted the translation of the entire poem. You might want to read it to get a better idea of the context.
Here's what I have for this particular stanza:
Out of the other pocket, the tip Of a white handkerchief Brushes the ground. It was a gift from an old maid Who had nurtured him.
Thank you for your suggestions. I'd rather stick to what I already have, with the addition of "bright" to emphasize the whiteness. It's virtually impossible to rhyme and keep the original meaning at the same time. For example, it cannot be assumed that the maid hemmed the handkerchief herself. That's not in the poem. It only says that the handkerchief was "white" and "hemmed", it doesn't say hemmed by whom. She could have bought it at the store, right? My overall approach is that meaning should take precedence over rhyming. Primarily, we are translators of meanings, not forms. In the case of poetry, it would be ideal to have both, but in most cases, it's just wishful thinking.
As per my suggestions, you could try to restructure it a bit, using hemmed as a verb - I would, as in my last entry in my answer. Obviously, you could leave the same structure, that would be your own choice. But I don't think something like this loses any of its lyrical impact: "From the other pocket, the white point, of a handkerchief..... hemmed together by the old maid brushed against the ground"
I have just seen your question on my comment, and yes, sorry, I think poetry and the kudoz format don't match :-). I was looking at the original trying to translate the sentence and missed that you did indeed write "tip" of a white handkerchief in your translation underneath. In this case, it would be the tip of a white hemmed handkerchief. I don't think kerchief would fit as it is more like a scarf.
A "handkerchief" primarily refers to a napkin made of cloth, used to maintain personal hygiene. A kerchief (from the French couvre-chef, "cover the head") is a triangular or square piece of cloth tied around the head or around the neck for protective or decorative purposes.
Thank you for your suggestion. I agree in part. "Hemmed" is the right meaning for this context. I did not assume that "sheated" was correct. I only made a comment that I thought the translation I found was too long. As far as the adjective order that you proposed, I would switch it around. Color takes precedence over type, and in this particular it's important to put color first because that's what I want to emphasize. See https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/grammar/british-grammar/... The solution here, in my opinion, is to incorporate Katarina's suggestion (i.e. "kerchief"). Apparently, it's a term used in literary circles. The translation would read, "white, hemmed kerchief". I also like it because it's shorter.
I don't think this is the verb required, and the sense is not translated this way. Surely this verb refers to the hem of the handkerchief. Is this not correct? If not, what do you mean through using sheathed to describe either a handkerchief or a colour? PS. I think that the "sheathed whiteness" might refer to a bandage used to set (or help heal) this person's injured leg - in the sense that a sheath is a covering of some sort.
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Answers
35 mins confidence: peer agreement (net): +2
whiteness of a hemmed handkerchief
Explanation: Here the meaning of embainhada most probably refers to the handkerchief hem, which was frequently laced or adorned in some way.
peer agreement (net): +2
