for yourself

English translation: work (this history) out in your own mind (without input from others)

GLOSSARY ENTRY (DERIVED FROM QUESTION BELOW)

English term or phrase:	for yourself
Selected answer:	work (this history) out in your own mind (without input from others)
Entered by:	Yvonne Gallagher

15:12 Oct 31, 2019

English language (monolingual) [PRO]
General / Conversation / Greetings / Letters / reflection on attachment history and ability to show up

English term or phrase: for yourself

Dear colleagues,
I’m not sure I’ve understood correctly the phrase “for yourself” right at the end of the passage below, taken from a parenting book.
Does it perhaps refer to “show up”, in the sense of “showing up for yourself” (before, the text says: show up for your kids…). Or maybe, does it mean “for your own good”?
Thank you so much for your patience!

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If your parents failed to show up for you, or showed up only sometimes, or behaved in scary and damaging ways, that doesn’t mean you can’t be there for your own kids in healthy and constructive ways. But it does mean you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history and determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children. You can actually choose the extent to which you show up for your kids, and yes, you can build your own capacity to show up by examining your history and making sense of it *** for yourself. ***

haribert KudoZ activity Questions: 289 (1 open) (1 without valid answers) (1 closed without grading) Answers: 524
Local time: 19:03

referring to "making sense of it for yourself"

Explanation:
not referring to "showing up" but to examining your own history, and understanding that so you can then "build your own capacity to show up"

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Note added at 14 mins (2019-10-31 15:27:00 GMT)
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because it's referring back to this
"you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history" (and [THEREBY] determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children)

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Note added at 15 mins (2019-10-31 15:28:39 GMT)
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so first you need to understand...

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Note added at 33 mins (2019-10-31 15:46:14 GMT)
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no need to rephrase. It's merely emphasising that YOU must work this out in your own mind (without input from others), so yes, on your own
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/think-fo...

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Note added at 5 days (2019-11-05 16:01:45 GMT) Post-grading
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glad to have helped

Selected response from:

Yvonne Gallagher
Ireland
Local time: 18:03

Grading comment

Thank you so much, Yvonne, for your valuable help! Many thanks also to all other participants!
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer

SUMMARY OF ALL EXPLANATIONS PROVIDED

4 +7

referring to "making sense of it for yourself"

Yvonne Gallagher

understanding it on your own

airmailrpl

5 -1

for your own sake, and theirs

Lara Silbert

Answers

18 hrs confidence:

making sense of it *** for yourself. *** understanding it on your own

Explanation:
making sense of it *** for yourself. *** => understanding it on your own

airmailrpl
Brazil
Local time: 14:03
Works in field
Native speaker of:

English,

Portuguese
PRO pts in category: 88

Notes to answerer

Asker: Thank you for your attempt!

1 day 10 hrs confidence:

peer agreement (net): -1

for your own sake, and theirs

Explanation:
Rather than this being "show up for yourself", it's saying that you can show up for your kids better by processing your own history, which in turn benefits your kids because you're parenting in a better place psychologically.

Example sentence(s):

I dealt with the ghosts of the past, for my own sake and that of my children.

Lara Silbert
Australia
Local time: 01:03
Works in field
Native speaker of: English

Notes to answerer

Asker: Thank you, Lara, for your contribution!

9 mins confidence:

peer agreement (net): +7

referring to "making sense of it for yourself"

Yvonne Gallagher
Ireland
Local time: 18:03
Specializes in field
Native speaker of:

English
PRO pts in category: 659

Grading comment

Thank you so much, Yvonne, for your valuable help! Many thanks also to all other participants!

Notes to answerer

Asker: Thank you, Yvonne! but how would you rephrase "for yourself"? maybe "on your own"? of for your own good?

Asker: Thank you so much, Yvonne! And thanks to Phil, too!

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English translation: work (this history) out in your own mind (without input from others)

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