brushes churning round and round

05:03 Sep 5, 2010 

Here's the Italian we already have for the segment of the poem that I listed earlier:


il camion dello spazzino
passava una volta la settimana
dalla primavera all’autunno

come un grande maggiolino si muoveva
nelle nostre mattine quiete
roteando le spazzole
sempre iniziava su dal serbatoio
e lentamente si avvicina sempre più

I changed "avvicina" to "avvicinava," and we're making a decision about whether to keep "serbatoio" or alter it. I'm mainly concerned that the imagery that is important to the poet is worded as descriptively in Italian as it is in English. In a few instances the translator has outdone the poet, but not here.

I feel like all the suggestions made so far are good contenders where the meaning is concerned - what about the flow, now that you can see the context?