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Off topic: Marrying a translator
Thread poster: Jarnail Gill

Gillian Searl  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 08:15
Member (2004)
German to English
Cross-cultural marriage is not to be under-estimated. Jan 12, 2007

Speaking as someone who has experience (of a failed marriage, UK-West African), do not under-estimate the ingrained power of culture and upbringing on both sides. "The way things are done" goes deep into your pysche and seriously affects "being happy". For cross-cultural marriage to succeed you need a great deal of openness and willingness to look at yourself and the other person, to look at how you live and select the good and reject the bad in each cultural perspective. There are plenty of dif... See more
Speaking as someone who has experience (of a failed marriage, UK-West African), do not under-estimate the ingrained power of culture and upbringing on both sides. "The way things are done" goes deep into your pysche and seriously affects "being happy". For cross-cultural marriage to succeed you need a great deal of openness and willingness to look at yourself and the other person, to look at how you live and select the good and reject the bad in each cultural perspective. There are plenty of difficulties in establishing a good marriage even if the two people come from next door (men are from Mars, women from Venus) but adding 2 (or more) cultures to the mix just makes the whole thing harder work. These issues are also frequently under-estimated by immigrants. For example, a 2nd generation immigrant may have adopted a great deal from the new country, plus have strong cultural ties to the old country, plus have grown up with parents stuggling to adapt. Going back to the old country for a mate can produce a lot of issues because the mate has not been exposed to the new culture.
Hope that helps.
Gillian
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Jarnail Gill  Identity Verified
India
Local time: 13:45
Member (2006)
English to Panjabi
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
thank you. Jan 12, 2007

Dear Gillian .. thank you very much for your valuable views.

 

Edward Vreeburg  Identity Verified
Netherlands
Local time: 09:15
Member (2008)
English to Dutch
+ ...
Getting serious Jan 12, 2007

Well, in answer to your serious hypothetical question:
Basically it would be the same as marrying somebody from the next village.
You have your habits and background, she has her habits and background.

Presumably you will find a common language to communicate in. Or one of you will learn the other's languague. (likely depending on the country you will live in)

You will have problems with papers and forneigners visa, and may even need to take integration cour
... See more
Well, in answer to your serious hypothetical question:
Basically it would be the same as marrying somebody from the next village.
You have your habits and background, she has her habits and background.

Presumably you will find a common language to communicate in. Or one of you will learn the other's languague. (likely depending on the country you will live in)

You will have problems with papers and forneigners visa, and may even need to take integration courses to be allowed to enter the country of your significant other.

In the early stages you will likely not understand eachothers friends and family if they speak a language you do not know, this could lead to frustration if your spouse translates it as " oh, that was not important".

Both of you will have to explain the culture, habits and everything you are used to , have grown up with, are accustomed to, or take for granted to the other one.

(Eg: what do you do when you visit your inlaws, is food included if you are invited to a party of a friend at 18.00, can you take two cookies with your coffee in the morning if the host serves from a cookie jar, will you shake hands of kiss the cheeks of friends, and will you kiss them 2, 3 or 4 times? ... etc, etc etc....)

Later you will laugh about these silly misunderstandings as you will tell your grandchildren all about these mishaps when they ask how to two of you got together...

Basically translators, (or multi lingual persons) are people too, so if you want a multi-cultural marriage - why not?
As with any marriage, it's a lot of work. Just because you have the same job, does not make it easier, or more difficult.

With your better half by your side, you can take on the world!

(and other parts of the universe to, if one of you has studied Klingon)

Ed
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momo savino
Switzerland
Local time: 09:15
Italian
+ ...
and staying happy Jan 12, 2007

jelly_gill wrote:

Hi all....this is really an off topic. What would happen if I marry a translator from other side of the globe?


I did not marry my teenage love because we lived on two different continents. 17 years passed and we still regret we did not. So my advise is : marry and enjoy love for ever

[Edited at 2007-01-12 10:48]


 

Emmanuelle Hingant  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 08:15
English to French
agree with Edward Jan 12, 2007

Edward Vreeburg wrote:

Basically it would be the same as marrying somebody from the next village. You have your habits and background, she has her habits and background.


I totally agree with you Edward.

Presumably you will find a common language to communicate in. Or one of you will learn the other's languague. (likely depending on the country you will live in)


My boyfriend is a freelance translator and comes from Barcelona (Spanish and Catalan). I'm a French freelance translator. We met and live together in Ireland so our common language is English. We plan on moving to Scotland. I think we both like to live in a country where none of us feels like a foreigner more than the other.

In the early stages you will likely not understand eachothers friends and family if they speak a language you do not know, this could lead to frustration if your spouse translates it as " oh, that was not important".


He speaks good French but sometimes "switches off" after spending the whole evening listening to my cousins, aunts, uncles, parents and siblings shouting, screaming and laughing. It's more than normal. I don't speak Spanish or Catalan but I'm trying. It's funny to go to see his family. His sister is an English teacher and I'm so happy to see her to have a rest! And his friends speak English so they're great.

Both of you will have to explain the culture, habits and everything you are used to , have grown up with, are accustomed to, or take for granted to the other one.


That's the best part. Explaining your background, visiting your city, your old school, your traditions (4 kisses on the cheeks where I come from! 2 if you know the person. 1 if it's family... lol!). Even though Spain and France are not that different.
And working together at home is good so far. As long as we don't work in the same room!

Good day.

Emma

[Edited at 2007-01-12 11:44]

[Edited at 2007-01-12 11:45]


 

Gabi Ancarol (X)
Italy
Italian to Spanish
+ ...
instead... Jan 12, 2007

momo savino wrote:

jelly_gill wrote:

Hi all....this is really an off topic. What would happen if I marry a translator from other side of the globe?


I did not marry my teenage love because we lived on two different continents. 17 years passed and we still regret we did not. So my advise is : marry and enjoy love for ever

[Edited at 2007-01-12 10:48]



... I did married him, even if we used to live 14.000 km apart. So far it's really working!


 

juvera  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:15
English to Hungarian
+ ...
The best part: Jan 17, 2007

Your lucky children can grow up bilingual.

All the best.



[Edited at 2007-01-17 00:52]


 

Alex Eames
Local time: 08:15
English to Polish
+ ...
It can work with good communication... Jan 17, 2007

...but remember you are marrying into the family as well.

It would be a very good investment in my opinion to have a good look at the family (in their own environment) before you make the commitment.

This is not always possible, but it is a good idea. (I doubt I will make it easy for any children we have to marry a foreigner without first doing this).

I had a few unpleasant surprises cropping up. If y
... See more
...but remember you are marrying into the family as well.

It would be a very good investment in my opinion to have a good look at the family (in their own environment) before you make the commitment.

This is not always possible, but it is a good idea. (I doubt I will make it easy for any children we have to marry a foreigner without first doing this).

I had a few unpleasant surprises cropping up. If you love your spouse almost nothing is unsurmountable, but it's a good idea to see what you're getting yourself into. Then you can decide if your love will overcome the obstacles. And if you think it won't - RUN, and when you catch your breath congratulate yourself on a well avoided "situation".

If we had started our life together in Poland rather than UK, it would not have worked out for us. Fortunately we lived first in the UK and so far it has.

I also agree that the "that was not important" comment when your spouse has had enough of interpreting for you is extremely annoying.
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lucylee
Local time: 16:15
English to Chinese
+ ...
It would be very challenging Feb 26, 2007

Marring a translator from another country ,
it would be very challenging and exciting experience
in my opinion,because first, you can learn the culture,
custom,and local language from your spouse, and
your child will have more gifts on language
if they grow up in a cross-national family.
Secondly, you'll have chance to enter into
new life circle,so your life will be more colorful and
different .
Third,about obstacles in ahead, due to you tw
... See more
Marring a translator from another country ,
it would be very challenging and exciting experience
in my opinion,because first, you can learn the culture,
custom,and local language from your spouse, and
your child will have more gifts on language
if they grow up in a cross-national family.
Secondly, you'll have chance to enter into
new life circle,so your life will be more colorful and
different .
Third,about obstacles in ahead, due to you two people owns
different background on life, education and social circles,
there must be always arguments araised owing to some very tiny problem for example, you love food from your country ,while,your spouse like food from her country, how
to settle this small problem?

after you started a new life with her,
this is only very simple one amongst thousands
of different questions,and all of these need you to be patient and capable of settling problems,
so if you gonna to marry her, then you have to be ready
to accept all questions ahead,and if you wanna keep your
cross marriage runnning successfully,then always remember
to understand and respect her..
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Wolfgang Jörissen  Identity Verified
Belize
Dutch to German
+ ...
Make sure it's not a fuzzy match ;-) Mar 5, 2007

Sorry, couldn't resist.

 

lingomania
Local time: 18:15
Italian to English
Benefits Apr 16, 2007

jelly_gill wrote:

Hi all....this is really an off topic. What would happen if I marry a translator from other side of the globe?


I think both your horizons would benefit from this union.


 

Traducendo Co. Ltd
Malta
Local time: 09:15
Member (2008)
Spanish to Italian
+ ...
Real question is... Jul 10, 2012

With all the different types of people you can meet in the world, why a translator?
we are lonesome, neurotic, stressed, often very poor, we spend most of our time talking about people (clients, PMs, other translators) that we haven't even met once, we got depressed for days because we missed the right sense of a word in a 50k words doc.... I mean, love is love and nothing is stronger, still maybe you can aim for a better category of people???...
See more
With all the different types of people you can meet in the world, why a translator?
we are lonesome, neurotic, stressed, often very poor, we spend most of our time talking about people (clients, PMs, other translators) that we haven't even met once, we got depressed for days because we missed the right sense of a word in a 50k words doc.... I mean, love is love and nothing is stronger, still maybe you can aim for a better category of people???

(of course I'm joking. All the best!!!!!!!)

gabriele
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