Off topic: Those nonsensical English plurals Thread poster: James McVay
|
|---|
James McVay 
United States
Local time: 05:08
Russian to English
+ ...
It just so happens that I happened across this little ditty and found to be a happening poem for those of us who happen to be translators
An ode to English plurals
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house... See more It just so happens that I happened across this little ditty and found to be a happening poem for those of us who happen to be translators
An ode to English plurals
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
In what other language do people recite at a
play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of
them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your
house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by
filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop? ▲ Collapse
| | | | Mats Wiman
Sweden
Local time: 11:08
Member (2000)
German to Swedish
+ ...
In memoriam | The English langauge is fascinating | Nov 2, 2010 |
intriguing, charming and has character!
MW
| | | | LEXpert
United States
Local time: 04:08
Member (2008)
Croatian to English
+ ...
| Mother's not a Mop because if she were... | Nov 2, 2010 |
...Father would be a Fop!
What an interesting piece!
I can only surmise that the plurals of similarly spelled singulars differ so greatly due to divergent etymologies.
[Edited at 2010-11-03 01:39 GMT]
| | | | Mailand
Local time: 11:08
Member (2009)
Italian to German
+ ...
| Languages are fascinating! | Nov 3, 2010 |
I've already seen the first part of the poem and passed it on to the English teacher of my son, who loved it. Isn't it the quirkyness of language which keeps us professionals going (imagine translating technical handbooks for days on end without stumbling on this kind of thing every once in a while ....)?
| | |
|
|
|
Mailand wrote:
I've already seen the first part of the poem and passed it on to the English teacher of my son, who loved it. Isn't it the quirkyness of language which keeps us professionals going (imagine translating technical handbooks for days on end without stumbling on this kind of thing every once in a while ....)?
and 100%!!!
| | | | To report site rules violations or get help, contact a site moderator: You can also contact site staff by submitting a support request » Those nonsensical English plurals | Anycount & Translation Office 3000 | Translation Office 3000
Translation Office 3000 is an advanced accounting tool for freelance translators and small agencies. TO3000 easily and seamlessly integrates with the business life of professional freelance translators.
More info » |
| | Trados Business Manager Lite | Create customer quotes and invoices from within Trados Studio
Trados Business Manager Lite helps to simplify and speed up some of the daily tasks, such as invoicing and reporting, associated with running your freelance translation business.
More info » |
|
| | | | X Sign in to your ProZ.com account... | | | | | |
Login to reply/comment 
