| Pages in topic: < [1 2] | Bilingual baby - what are the rules Thread poster: duffie68 (X)
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| Bilingual Families List | May 26, 2005 |
Hi all,
anyone interested should check out our resources section:
http://www.proz.com/topic/22085
Cheers,
Berni
Dad to Jana 11/11/98
OPOL Dad (Eng) Mum (Esp) Street (Cat)
| | | | Natalia Elo 
Germany
Local time: 04:03
English to Russian
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| The Bilingual Families List | May 27, 2005 |
Hi again,
duffie68 wrote:
Dear Natalia
I appreciate your response and would like the mailing list address please!
Many thanks
Duffie
As I think that others might be interested as well, so I post it here.
http://www.nethelp.no/cindy/biling-fam.html
You will find joining instructions there. As I long as I know there is no archive on the page, which is a pity (or maybe I just wasn't able to find it). Anyway it is useful first to read what thez have on the page. In particullar I recommend you first read the definitions, because otherwise it*s sometimes a bit difficult to understand all these ML ml ds dh etc.
What else I wanted to tell is that it is difficult, but REALLY rewarding to see the results after a few years.
Cheers,
Natalia.
[Edited at 2005-05-27 08:10]
| | | | juvera
Local time: 03:03
English to Hungarian
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As all of the other contributors said, consistency is the key word.
Read Larissa's letter again, very carefully. Her experience is quite common, and if she didn't realise what was happening, her earlier effort would have come to very little.
You live in England, and your husband can talk to the baby in English. Fine, that's enough to make her learn Eglish.
You should talk to her in French all the time.
Your mother should NEVER talk to her in English, unle... See more As all of the other contributors said, consistency is the key word.
Read Larissa's letter again, very carefully. Her experience is quite common, and if she didn't realise what was happening, her earlier effort would have come to very little.
You live in England, and your husband can talk to the baby in English. Fine, that's enough to make her learn Eglish.
You should talk to her in French all the time.
Your mother should NEVER talk to her in English, unless it is absolutely necessary for some special reason.
The point is, that you have to start doing it now, consistently, because it is easier for the baby to learn this way. By the time she reaches the "terrible three" age, she might kick up such a fuss, that you may not have the time and energy etc. to fight the issue, and it will be more difficult.
This way she will learn, it will be natural, and she won't start yelling "Don't talk to me in French" when she becomes conscious of the two languages.
You are giving her a great gift for life, and it will enable her to learn other languages easier as well in the future, if she wants to.
Good luck
Judith ▲ Collapse
| | | | E.LA
Spanish to German
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There are a lot of rules which you can follow. If you ask bilingual people, you will get to hear a lot of different rules and possibilities - to fill a book off (and there are a lot of books over this).
There is only one rule you must observe:
That you follow it all the time!
Will say, if you decide to speak french at dinner time, then you must do it every time at dinner.
(But not when only English guests are present, but every time you are alone with... See more There are a lot of rules which you can follow. If you ask bilingual people, you will get to hear a lot of different rules and possibilities - to fill a book off (and there are a lot of books over this).
There is only one rule you must observe:
That you follow it all the time!
Will say, if you decide to speak french at dinner time, then you must do it every time at dinner.
(But not when only English guests are present, but every time you are alone with your child.).
The rule you most will hear is that one person speaks all the time the same language to the child - its the best way that he/she really learns the language. ▲ Collapse
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| Losing the native language | Oct 1, 2005 |
Benno Groeneveld wrote:
I spoke Dutch to our son (and he heard me speak the language on the phone all the time, I worked at home as a journalist/translator). Which he accepted until he was about seven years old and told me that I should stop speaking Dutch to him.
I did stop, mostly, but now that he's 21 he complains I never listened to him when he was young, except for that one time I shouldn't have listened -- when he didn't want me to speak Dutch any more.
Benno
St. Paul, Minnesota
I am especially interested in bilingual education for children now, since my husband and I are expecting our first baby in a week. We are both Russian living in the US. We speak Russian at home and will speak it to the baby. But I am concerned that once she starts school, she may prefer English. In several cases of our friends (same situation - both parents speaking Russian), as soon as the children reached schoolage, it took them 1-2 months to start speaking perfect English and with the time prefer to speak it everywhere and at home with the parents. It seems like English is dominating for them and they want to speak it, rather than Russian. They also ask their parents to stop speaking Russian to them and only speak English, like Benno says in the quote above (it is more true with the boys than girls fot whatever reason). When kids get more exposed to English, that is when they start speaking Russian with an accent, even though no accent was before they started schooling.
Any ideas how to keep the parents' native language the main one for children in a foreign country?
Also, can anyone recommend any books about how to raise children bilingual?
Thank you,
Veronica
New York, NY
| | | | | Doubts after years | Apr 24, 2010 |
Elizabeth Adams wrote: I speak only English to my son (1 year 5 months) at home and his father speaks only Russian to him. But when we go out to play I speak Russian to him so that the other kids won't stare at him (we live in Moscow). But if he and I are just taking a walk by ourselves I speak English to him. But then again, if guests come over who don't speak English then we all speak Russian. So we try to be consistent while taking the context into account. So far we've noticed that the things he understands - he understands in both languages. Don't ask me how. They're smarter than we are. 
Hi Elizabeth,
My husband and I are trying to have a baby, he speaks Portuguese and I speak English and Portuguese, and I had doubts on how to raise a bilingual child because I don´t know how to act in front of guests and out of my house, and I read how you did. What I want to know is if your son, after all these years, (2002 to 2010) speaks both language, and how did it work, speaking out of your home, one language and in, another.
Everywhere I check, it says that it´s good for each parent to talk on language with the child, but it seems like they all forgot that we do go out and we do have guests at home that in my case, don´t speak English, as we live in Brazil!!
Do you have any tips to help me out?
Thanks for now!
[Edited at 2010-04-24 01:37 GMT]
[Edited at 2010-04-24 01:38 GMT]
| | | | Suzan Hamer
Netherlands
Local time: 04:03
English
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| At 22, my daughter has 2 "mother tongues"... | Apr 24, 2010 |
I learned long ago in a Child Development psychology class that in a bilingual home one parent should consistently speak one language. I can't remember the study or studies that was based on, or much else, except that it made it easier and less confusing for the child if one parent spoke one language with the child all the time. Oh yes, and that each parent should speak their own mother tongue to prevent passing on poor grammar and other mistakes to the child.
I raised my daughter... See more I learned long ago in a Child Development psychology class that in a bilingual home one parent should consistently speak one language. I can't remember the study or studies that was based on, or much else, except that it made it easier and less confusing for the child if one parent spoke one language with the child all the time. Oh yes, and that each parent should speak their own mother tongue to prevent passing on poor grammar and other mistakes to the child.
I raised my daughter in the Netherlands as a single parent. Since English is my mother tongue, we spoke English in the home, but outside she heard Dutch. By the time she was three (we moved here when she was about 2), she could speak Dutch with the kids she played with and adults outside our home, and when she started school at 4 she was perfectly fluent in both Dutch and English.
I was surprised though to find that apparently Dutch was her "real" mother tongue. I overheard her playing with her Barbies, and her Barbies "spoke" Dutch.
When she entered university, she was unable to say, when asked, which was her mother tongue. She feels equally at home in both languages.
What I find interesting is that on a certain level, her personality when she speaks Dutch, her mannerisms, tone of voice and even facial expressions, are different than when she speaks English.
I agree with whoever said children are little language sponges. I regret now that I didn't play French records in the WC (as did the father in "Cheaper by the Dozen") or make/let her watch TV in Arabic or Chinese when she was young. She probably would have absorbed those languages too. Watching my daughter acquire language, it seemed to me that young children don't seem to discriminate between languages or categorize them in their minds and say oh this is Dutch or that is English. They just soak up the words and somehow know when and how to use them. By that I mean, they will use only Dutch words when speaking to a Dutch person and only English words when speaking English. As if there is some sort of automatic/unconscious internal sorting and matching going on.
I say all this in retrospect. I never made any conscious effort to do one thing or the other to encourage my daughter to be bilingual. It just "happened." I spoke my mother tongue to her, so she learned correct English, and she heard and learned Dutch outside the home (and from her Dutch relatives). I also think TV helped a lot... She heard both English and Dutch from the TV, which perhaps made it obvious to her that neither language is "better" or "easier" or more important than the other, and prepared her for the idea that it's a multilingual world out there.
[Edited at 2010-04-24 10:42 GMT]
[Edited at 2010-04-24 10:44 GMT] ▲ Collapse
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| Don't worry... | Apr 24, 2010 |
... about speaking your own language in front of friends. They should understand why you are giving the gift of love that is another language to your child... and if they don't..??? Maybe they were friends in name only.
| | | | Brian Young
United States
Local time: 19:03
Danish to English
| Two languages- the perfect gift | Apr 24, 2010 |
I speak here as one who failed at this, so it is a warning to all who are interested.
For 18 years my wife (Danish) and I (American) spoke only Danish, and our kids spoke only Danish. The first time my youngest daughter heard me speak English she freaked out. I was suddenly like some total stranger to her.
Then we all moved to the USA, and because the older three were well into their teens, we decided, for their sake, to switch to English only. That was in in 1982, so I have some per... See more I speak here as one who failed at this, so it is a warning to all who are interested.
For 18 years my wife (Danish) and I (American) spoke only Danish, and our kids spoke only Danish. The first time my youngest daughter heard me speak English she freaked out. I was suddenly like some total stranger to her.
Then we all moved to the USA, and because the older three were well into their teens, we decided, for their sake, to switch to English only. That was in in 1982, so I have some perspective on this.
The youngest (eight) was speaking fluent and accent free English within six months. The older ones never got completely rid of their accent, but they have all forgotten Danish. We just never had what it takes to persist in using two languages, and that has hurt everyone. My spoken Danish has gone down the tubes (though that has no affect whatever on my translation). My wife cannot get herself to speak Danish anymore, and the kids can barely understand it.
Up until the age of eight (or so), kids will have no problem learning the language you speak to them, and they will automatically learn what is spoken in their environment.
It is a priceless gift you can give your children, and you only have one chance to do it. If you wait too long it will be too late. ▲ Collapse
| | | | | Let me introduce You to Lorenzo | Apr 25, 2010 |
I am German. my husband Italian. Kids were upraised in German School- teaching It.as well. since today I talk to my "boys" only in Germ, while the father uses It.
Lorenzo (now 4 and 3 months) was born in the Netherlands. Mother speaks only Spanish in the family, my son It. in the family and different languages for business, but none of them speak Dutch.
Lorenzo started to talk on the phone (at the beginning I'did'nt understand, a word yes, a sentence no - as his brother ... See more I am German. my husband Italian. Kids were upraised in German School- teaching It.as well. since today I talk to my "boys" only in Germ, while the father uses It.
Lorenzo (now 4 and 3 months) was born in the Netherlands. Mother speaks only Spanish in the family, my son It. in the family and different languages for business, but none of them speak Dutch.
Lorenzo started to talk on the phone (at the beginning I'did'nt understand, a word yes, a sentence no - as his brother Matteo (2) does now -) today he speaks a perfect Italian, with grammar rules that even adults forget, "nonna! se io fossi più spesso a Roma, avrei altri giocattoli? Sto andando a cena! (age 3 1/2) - perfect Spanish, translates Dutch for his parents- got it in the Kindergarden - is now in an English- preschool, and roared with laughter when the "nonno- grandfather" at Christmas tried: what is this?- a fork, a knife- a spoon...to test him. bread: ! paaaniuoo! he cried out- that was the end of the language test, since the grandfather was not up to his level.
let the kids alone- is my advice. Give them all of the opportunities You can afford through an ordinary school system. use a proper and grammatically correct language in the family. But do not force them. never.
P.s., my son informed me that It. will be the last language used by Lorenzo now. he prefers Ingl. now, Sp. in the the family, Dutch outside, Engl at the primary school he has to attend very soon- aug. 20,th , age 4 and 1/2
Let them go their way- ....
Eva ▲ Collapse
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