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This year's craziest translation job request Thread poster: Jeff Whittaker
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Jeff Whittaker 
United States
Local time: 09:43
Member (2002)
Spanish to English
+ ...
"Dear Colleagues,
Please excuse this mass e-mail. (See all the names and addresses above and as you can see, we have a lot of translators so don’t feel special.) We have an exciting job opportunity. We urgently need translators and editors to translate five short PDF files. Although these files contain an estimated total of 980 words, we have put them through our OCR system and there are about 350 repetitions, leaving a total of 630 new words to be translated. We are hoping to get... See more "Dear Colleagues,
Please excuse this mass e-mail. (See all the names and addresses above and as you can see, we have a lot of translators so don’t feel special.) We have an exciting job opportunity. We urgently need translators and editors to translate five short PDF files. Although these files contain an estimated total of 980 words, we have put them through our OCR system and there are about 350 repetitions, leaving a total of 630 new words to be translated. We are hoping to get these files translated and edited within the next two hours, so we would like to get ten translators and ten editors to each take 63 words or so. These 63 words must be translated and edited using our exclusive on-line tool as part of our ten-stage translation and editing process. The system should only take you a few minutes to learn once you have registered and once you get your username and password. I have enclosed the 40-page instruction manual for our translation system as well as the 20-page style manual for this client, the non-disclosure form and our contract for you to sign and return to us. For your convenience, we also have an on-line invoicing system where you can upload your invoice to us. Invoices are accepted by our system no sooner than 30 days following the project due date and are processed at the end of the following month. You will then receive a payment confirmation e-mail to which you must respond within four hours, otherwise the invoice will be rejected and must be re-submitted. Please include your per-word rate in your response. Because of our agreement with this client, we do not accept minimum fees. In addition, for your convenience, we pay exclusively in tokens. You can proudly display these tokens on your website or redeem them at various partner on-line shops."
[Edited at 2011-12-14 14:46 GMT]
Disclaimer: Any similarity to real translation job requests is purely coincidental.
This sounds like a job for Mox!
[Edited at 2011-12-14 15:05 GMT] ▲ Collapse
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[Edited at 2011-12-14 15:00 GMT]
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Lingua 5B
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Local time: 15:43
Member (2009)
English to Croatian
+ ...
| The winner, absolutely | Dec 14, 2011 |
Is this some kind of SF movie script?
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Diana Coada (X)
United Kingdom
Local time: 14:43
Portuguese to English
+ ...
| I am shocked and speechless. | Dec 14, 2011 |
On second thought... maybe if they paid in Nectar points...
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| Thanks, this made my day! | Dec 14, 2011 |
Especially this part:
don’t feel special.) We have an exciting job opportunity
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XXXphxxx (X)
United Kingdom
Local time: 14:43
Portuguese to English
+ ...
| Where did you see it? | Dec 14, 2011 |
It's obviously a joke. Spot-on really
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Thanks so much for this, Jeff! This made me laugh out loud. Got better and better the more I read!
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Lingua 5B
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Local time: 15:43
Member (2009)
English to Croatian
+ ...
| lol i wanna be paid in Martian money | Dec 14, 2011 |
63 words... what can I do to get 65 words, please? I'll do anything.
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Samuel Murray
Netherlands
Local time: 15:43
Member (2006)
English to Afrikaans
+ ...
| The scary part... | Dec 14, 2011 |
...is that much of it is not science fiction.
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excellent
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Roberto Lombino
Czech Republic
Local time: 15:43
Member (2011)
English to Italian
+ ...
| I thought that there were just 7 wonderworls, but this is the 8th !! | Dec 14, 2011 |
[Modificato alle 2011-12-14 15:02 GMT]
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Robert Forstag
United States
Local time: 09:43
Spanish to English
+ ...
| The two faces of theatre | Dec 14, 2011 |
Very funny, and yet also tragic.
It is a shame that so many of the inquiries that freelancers receive serve as nothing more than fodder for parody and lament....
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Damian Harrison (X)
Germany
Local time: 15:43
German to English
| Thanks Jeff! | Dec 14, 2011 |
That's hilarious!
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Lingua 5B
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Local time: 15:43
Member (2009)
English to Croatian
+ ...
| The tragic part | Dec 14, 2011 |
the tragic part is not that they were allowed to post something like this, what's tragic is that they will actually get many responses from freelancers.
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Elías Sauza
Mexico
Local time: 07:43
Member (2002)
English to Spanish
+ ...
| You're right | Dec 14, 2011 |
Samuel Murray wrote:
...is that much of it is not science fiction.
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